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Damn It, You Guys!

July 10, 2010

Okay, so I usually stay the fuck out of all the drama that slinks around the blogosphere, but something jumped out at me this time, and I must say that I’m highly disappointed that so many people have no problems whatsoever jumping down another’s throat for their beliefs and advice.  I’m not sure who threw up and made you (general) the authority over what was right and wrong, but whatever.
Alright, here is my comment on the posts that preceded the sharing of my opinion:
“You will all do well to remember that our personal blogs are just that, PERSONAL.  We are all humans behind these computer screens, and as such, we are subject to being disagreed with, and possibly, hurt by what others deem as inappropriate or, as I’ve seen all too often, “wrong“.  It’s a sad shame that so many of you, without so much as batting an eyelash, will lash out to hurt others because you disagree.  Just like the rest of you, people have hurt me with their comments, however, rather than claiming they are wrong and should DIAF (is this really a serious thing people are using?  How disgraceful and utterly appalling.), maybe it’s time to reevaluate what exactly, is really going on.
There is a rather sizable group of folks, that agree with a particular side of an argument; and a rather sizable group of folks who do not.   This horde of people are intertwined by forces other than this particular argument.  BOTH sides have the RIGHT to speak their positions.  The part that pisses me off comes in when people use personal attacks.  I know all of you one way or another, and I’m friendly with almost everyone I meet, but I simply will not accept foolish and childish behavior.  Every single one of you, is WAY better than resorting to melodramatic attacks on someone’s personal space.  I’m disappointed to see so much drama and random bullshit.  It’s despicable, and you should all be punished (teehee, I gets to do the punishing).  For so many young and successful women, to run around like heathen orphan children online is just unbelievable.  Do you realize the message you are sending is exactly the one you don’t want to send to your everyday female?  Certainly not the older women, who rarely see themselves as “victims”, and prefer to DO something OTHER than bitch online.  It’s high time all the women responding and complaining on Holla Back blogs, get up off their computers and FIGHT BACK!!!!  Just because you are female does not give you the right to be victimized, and you CAN do something about it.”

Now it’s time, for me to put in MY two cents about all this, and how it works in MY relationship.  I will only say this once, so let’s go slow.  AS IT SO HAPPENS, I CONSIDER BRITINI A FRIEND, BUT THAT DOES NOT MEAN WE HAVE TO AGREE ON EVERYTHING.  WHAT HAPPENED TO HER IS GROSS AND HORRIBLE, HOWEVER I HAPPEN TO AGREE VERY MUCH WITH TAYLOR’S POST, IF WE REMOVE ALL REFERENCE TO ANY OTHER PARTIES AND JUST SPEAK IN GENERAL TERMS.  EVERYONE HAS THE RESPONSIBILITY TO PROTECT THEMSELVES.
THIS IS MY OPINION, AND HOW IT WORKS IN MY RELATIONSHIP.  DO NOT CONFUSE MY OPINION WITH WHAT IS RIGHT OR WRONG.  DO NOT TRY TO TELL ME I AM WRONG, AND GO ON TO EXPLAIN HOW I CAN BETTER LIVE MY LIFE BY BEING MORE POLITICALLY CORRECT.  IN THIS COUNTRY I HAVE THE RIGHT TO EXPRESS MYSELF, AS DO YOU, BUT IF ONE COMMENT COMES ACROSS MY BLOG TELLING ME TO DIAF(DIE IN A FIRE), YOU WILL BE DELETED, AND THE RAIN OF A 1,259 HELLS WILL COME DOWN ON YOUR HEAD.  PLEASE KEEP ALL COMMENTS PERTAINING TO THIS POST AND NO OTHERS.  I’M NOT GOING TO REHASH WHAT HAS ALREADY BEEN SAID.

Although, I consider myself Kristopher’s property, as does he, I am very rarely ever treated like property.  I am spoiled relentlessly.  Ask anyone who knows me well, and I’m positive the fact that my laundry is dropped off and done for me, the fact that I have had a maid, and you probably don’t even want to get them started on how often he randomly buys me presents.   My point is, I have an amazing husband, who loves to see me happy and getting my way.  He’s old fashioned, but not really the M-type.  My job as his wife and property, is to see that he is happy and healthy.  I am to run and manage his home, pay bills, cook meals, etc..  I don’t have strict rules like some of the other O/p relationships you may see around.  We are just very traditional in our approach to how life should be lived in a committed relationship.  I am his wife, therefore I am his property.  I cannot leave him, and he has final say in all decisions except the children.  I do have to ask permission to spend money, but as far as rules go, nah, just act decent in public at least.
Do we have hiccups in our marriage?  Of course.  Duh.
Do we hurt each other? Sure, all the time.
Do we expect certain things from the other without fear of repercussions?  You better fuckin believe it!

Expectations in a relationship are to be, well , expected.  That’s how you grow, and learn, and feel each other out.  Sometimes those expectations aren’t met, and there are consequences to that.  If I lead him to believe that I’m turned on, and then withdraw, I’m probably still going to get fucked.  Is it sexual assault?  No, not in my book.  I am his wife, and as his wife, it is definitely my job to perform sexually if he deems that necessary.  Could he go to jail for that?  Yep.
If he pisses me off then decides it’s not worth fighting about, I’m still going to bitch and fight, and throw a temper tantrum.  He has the authority to put his foot down and tell me to shut up, if he so chooses.  Even still, short of gagging me or leaving, I don’t see how he can force me to stop.  Is this unwanted forced listening?  Absolutely.  Is it a form of audio rape? Sure.  Have I gone to jail for bitching? Nope.

You know, I suppose my feelings usually gravitate towards the family.  I feel it is an institution that this country is founded on, and if people are more concerned with themselves, they have less to be concerned about others.  People aren’t having children until they are way too old to be having them.  No one is getting married, and treating it like the commitment that it is.  In fact, most everyone has become so insanely self-centered these days, that everyone is a victim of some sort, but at some point that has to stop, and responsibility for your own actions has to be taken into account.  Aside from what I may or may not prescribe to or believe in, the point is, as I see it, the young people of today are not focused on what they should be.  The older ones, the people who have lived and experienced, are shunned and shamed for our belief system.  What a bunch of hogwash.   We have played and tested the society you live in, and paved the road for young women like you to stand up and fight for your own protection, and you have seriously disappointed us all by:  forcing men into some strange mold they hate being in, scared to even smile at a woman or come to her rescue in her time of need out of fear, and coercing women to believe that all men should be feared because they could rape you.  It’s a pity, and I have a hard time accepting that so many educated and intelligent young women honestly believe they should just be able to run hog wild and act however they want, without suffering the consequences of those said actions.  I’m sorry to bust your bubble, but the world will not change to fit you, because you’re simply not that special, you have to change to fit the world.

One Comment leave one →
  1. July 13, 2010 9:19 am

    This:

    “We have played and tested the society you live in, and paved the road for young women like you to stand up and fight for your own protection, and you have seriously disappointed us all by: forcing men into some strange mold they hate being in, scared to even smile at a woman or come to her rescue in her time of need out of fear, and coercing women to believe that all men should be feared because they could rape you. It’s a pity, and I have a hard time accepting that so many educated and intelligent young women honestly believe they should just be able to run hog wild and act however they want, without suffering the consequences of those said actions. I’m sorry to bust your bubble, but the world will not change to fit you, because you’re simply not that special, you have to change to fit the world.”

    Yes, in so many fucking ways. But you know what? They won’t fucking get it and may never. Which is why I avoid them. It’s just easier than dealing with their whiny dramatic ways. There’s a certain stupidity that’s prevalent in youth, and some grow out of it and some don’t. Let life over a span of, say, a decade or so rip them a new asshole and see if they get a clue. Color me doubtful.

    Good post.

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