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Marriage Comes First

July 7, 2009

That statement ruffles feathers in a lot of circles. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard slaves and Masters alike, say their marriage is merely an afterthought to their M/s relationship. Which is fantastic for those people. If their relationship works well that way, more power to them. Our relationship however, is not that ingrained just yet. We are both very committed to making our M/s dynamic work for us, but our marriage does and will probably always come first.

I’ve mentioned that we are having problems, mostly with communicating with each other. There is a lot of situational stress involved as well. I, myself, am getting depressed. Because of all this we as a couple have decided to place the 24/7 aspect of our M/s on the back burner, and work on strengthening our core relationship. As Melen has stated before, without doing so, our M/s will definitely fail. We want to make it a point to stay here on ID, and let all of you see what we do to get back on track with our M/s, but more importantly we want you to also see what we find important in our relationship and what works and does not work for us.

We had a good day yesterday. We were actually able to sit and have a conversation that didn’t go in circles. We discussed possible solutions, and actions we could both take to make things better. We didn’t fight, and when things did get heated, we separated until we could come back together with different attitudes. We’ll just have to take it one day at a time, until it becomes second nature to be able to communicate effectively.

We’re not sure how long this process will take, or how many different methods we will have to try, but giving up isn’t an option. For now, that’s at least one thing we never have to worry about disagreeing on.

Side Note: I will be continuing to use Master when I talk of my husband, but only for the purposes of the blog. Also, our bedroom shenanigans will still be M/s based.

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